The flawed idea of chasing your passion
Following your passion is often overhyped and misleading. Instead of chasing after it, focus on your growth, as the belief that we must find our passion to succeed is flawed.
We live in a world obsessed with passion. Everywhere you look, from social media to motivational talks, the message is clear: find your passion and follow it. It’s seductive advice, isn’t it? After all, who wouldn’t want to spend their life doing what they love?
But here’s the catch — this cultural obsession with passion can be more harmful than helpful.
When I was a child, I went through phases like most kids do. At one point, I wanted to be a doctor, then a banker, and, thanks to a convincing physics teacher, even a chemical engineer. It’s funny because none of these ideas came from any deep-seated passion. They were simply reflections of the information I had at the time.
In Class 7 (JSS1), something happened: I discovered I could write with ease. I’d grown up surrounded by books — my dad made sure of that with his bedtime stories and the ones I later bought myself. But even then, I wasn’t struck by some lightning bolt of passion. It was just another interest, shaped by my environment and experiences.
So, is passion something we’re born with, or is it a social construct, designed to make us feel like we’re failing if we don’t “find it”?
Defining passion: reality or social construct
Let’s talk about what passion really is. It’s often described as this intense, undeniable force that drives our career and life choices. It sounds wonderful, doesn’t it?
But, if we’re honest, passion is more often the result of societal pressure than anything inherently real. Media and the self-help industry feed us this idea, convincing us that we’re supposed to find our one true calling.
In 2016, I thought I’d found mine. I became deeply interested in young adults and mental health. My autism diagnosis and everything I’d experienced made me think that I was passionate about creating spaces where young people could thrive mentally. But the more I’ve reflected, the more I’ve realised that what I thought was passion was more about empathy and exposure than anything innate. It wasn’t this magical “aha” moment where I discovered my life’s purpose — it was shaped by the challenges I’d faced and the needs I saw in the world.
These days, lots of people are jumping into tech careers. Is that passion? Or is it just that tech is a booming industry with lots of opportunity? More often than not, it’s about exposure — what you see, what you’re told, and what experiences you’ve had. Passion, in the traditional sense, rarely enters the equation.
The allure of passion: Why it feels so real
Passion feels intoxicating because it taps into two powerful human desires: purpose and belonging. It makes us feel like we’re doing something meaningful, something that defines us. That’s why it’s so seductive. Once we believe we’ve found our passion, we experience something called confirmation bias. We actively seek out experiences that validate this feeling. It’s like when you buy a new phone, and suddenly everyone around you seems to have the same one — it feels like you’ve made the right choice, even if it was arbitrary.
Then there’s the idealisation of passion. We imagine it as this perfect, never-fading force that will guide us through life. But the reality? Passion is fickle. It changes, fades, and is often an emotion that can’t be sustained long-term. Real life is messy, full of ups and downs, and passion alone isn’t enough to see us through the tough bits.
The downsides of chasing passion
So what happens when we put passion on a pedestal? We set ourselves up for disappointment. We start to believe that if we’ve found our passion, life will somehow become easier. But that’s rarely the case. Passion can create unrealistic expectations, making us think we’ll love every moment of our work, and when reality doesn’t match that fantasy, we’re left frustrated.
There’s also the very real risk of burnout. Passion can drive us to go all in, but when that initial excitement wears off, what’s left? If we’re not careful, we can burn out from constantly chasing that high. The truth is, passion may ignite the spark, but it’s discipline and consistency that keep the fire going.
Finally, chasing passion can lead to narrow thinking. When we’re laser-focused on one pursuit, we might overlook other opportunities that could bring us just as much fulfilment — if not more. By clinging to the idea that we must follow one path, we close ourselves off to the possibility of finding happiness in unexpected places.
The aternative to passion: Embrace curiosity and discipline
If passion isn’t the answer, what is? The secret lies in focusing on growth, curiosity, and discipline. Instead of chasing a single passion, we should be looking for opportunities to develop our skills and explore our interests. Often, passion doesn’t come at the start of a journey — it emerges over time, as we become more competent in a field.
For instance, think about people who pursue careers in tech. Most don’t start with a burning passion for coding or algorithms. They begin with curiosity, maybe a desire to solve a problem, and as they develop their skills, passion follows. The same can be said for any profession. Passion grows through investment in the process, not from the outset.
Then there’s the role of discipline. It’s easy to be excited when something is new, but what about when the excitement fades? The people who succeed aren’t necessarily the ones who start with the most passion—they’re the ones who show up every day, putting in the work, even when they don’t feel like it. Success is built on consistency, not just enthusiasm.
In the end, the idea that we must find our passion to succeed is flawed. It sets us up for disappointment and burnout. Instead of chasing passion, we should focus on curiosity, growth, and meaningful work. Success doesn’t come from discovering a single, all-encompassing passion — it comes from exploring, learning, and consistently showing up.
So here’s the real challenge: stop chasing the illusion of passion. Embrace the process of growth and follow your curiosity. Passion will follow when you invest in your skills and keep moving forward. Remember, passion isn’t a destination — it’s something that develops through effort and a willingness to explore new paths.
If you’re learning, growing, and staying curious, you’re already on the right track — whether passion is there or not.